345. Male and female

This topic was touched upon before but there still seems to be many who consider the female side inferior or those who do not understand how to bring balance in the two aspects. Very often it leads to it being presented in the outer world of a person and then taken as a way to unify again, that you can’t be whole unless you are with another person. For this reason I would like to show you it is not the physical expressions of male and female, it’s that female side is feeling and male is mind. Or Hart and mind. Both on their own they see only half, feeling must become wise. So the feeling comes to know itself. Where it comes from, if it is pure or not, it can verbally express it so the right insight develops. As said the whole material and non material is based on frequency, vibration, and electromagnetics. Each pattern seeking to express itself. Good and evil. So when feeling is fully joined with mind and looks within, he/she will know the right from wrong and know its path.

But how then can you bring balance between the male and female within? While it is only then that one starts to open ones eyes and will the blindness be taken away. Let’s look at it from both sides to see what qualities they both have that will complement each other.

We talked about the zodiac and lightly on it effecting the chakras but we didn’t talk about the energy that flows within them in detail. But reading the first part of this article made it clear that there are lots of kinds of that energy through and around us. But let’s talk about two specific energies, yin and yang or male and female. Male energy is focused and female energy is creative and random, neither of them are weaker or greater than the other by nature but they vary due to them being unbalanced. And both can be extremely powerful when fully manifested.

Female energy is the land of possibilities and creative potential in effecting the universe from within, focused male energy takes direct roads from point A to point B, this energy is like a missile with great thrust accomplishing tasks in going where it needs to go, with precision and without distraction. It is best seen in nature. Picture the Fibonacci spiral, the blocks or squares are the male path, remember it starts at 1 and flows outwards forever in a very specific way. The male moves from base point to base point, it doesn’t curve, but follows straight lines. Female however, would flow into the actual spiral, it would go around, in and around outside all the lines but still getting the same or similar results. This is a graphical representation of how it flows, but it also acts in the same way. From this understanding you can start seeing how we use these energies in our lives, it’s the difference from driving straight to work and being on schedule all the time and taking the scenic route because it is a pleasant ride, even if it means being late. It’s like baking a cake strictly by what it says in the cookbook and putting it together with what feels right. It is getting promoted for working hardest and getting that promotion for coming up with the best ideas. Both male and female energies, like the cakes have their own traits, male energy is linear, analytical, strategic and practical. However when male energy is constricted it is very blundering and confrontational and what tends to occur is not seeing all sides of a situation or it is not being open to any other possibility other than the one being pursued, so clearly seen in today’s society. We call it being narrow minded. Female energy on the other hand moves in curves, it does not stay inside the lines. It is creativity and movement, expression and emotion, it can do anything and go anywhere but has trouble sticking to schedule. If constricted it can get out of its flow, running rampant between emotions, mood swings and ideas. The creativity could get jumbled and come out as an out of control mess. We don’t have this widespread issue in today’s society, and it has a lot to do with our brain hemispheres. One big difference between the two is that the male energy looks at parts and the female energy looks at wholes. So to be really clear male and female energy has very little to do with sexual orientation. Back to brain hemispheres! We have two of them, the left brain is the male energy side of the brain. It is orderly, statistical, logical and mathematical. The right brain is female, it is our creative side, a free spirit, passion and experience of taste and feeling, movement and art. As is the same with the energy, the left brain cannot make sense out of the right brain. You cannot put feeling and expression within boxes, they must be felt to be truly experienced. The right brain too cannot make sense of how the left brain understands things. As a species we are primarily left brained, this means we essentially have a male energy imbalance, way too much of it. It is dominant and constricting on the female side of the brain. Now don’t get me wrong, this isn’t a bad thing. In fact it is a kind of blessing in disguise. But we need to talk about some other things first, so there is nothing wrong with our female energy we’re just not using it to potential. Our male energy is really messed up and that is why we are where we are right now. By where we are I mean economical, political, financial, religiously, environmentally, the mighty close their eyes for it, but it’s a global crisis.

Some will say study them, they are all completely separate issues and this is how male energy looks at parts, luckily some are realizing now that it is constricting our view.

As a whole, all these issues together are further proof that we do not understand how to be harmonious, in other words our male and female energy are out of sync with each other and the planet.

As nature seeks to balance itself many if not most of the kids born lately are right brain oriented but struggle to learn in a traditional left brain system. Often not understood they are diagnosed as having ADHD since they appear impulsive. Their brains can process information faster and require movement to help keep them focused, they are often very intuitive, and when their needs are not met, they appear self centered and demanding although it’s not their true nature.

In 3D masculine energy and feminine energy are very much out of balance. Have you ever played a game where you did not know the rules of the game and yet you kept playing? Like the stock market, for example. How did you do? Most in 3D or in other words the third dimension do not know the rules and they don’t know how to succeed or exit the game. Becoming aware of and understanding the rules and the structures of the third and fourth dimension, with the fourth I mean time, is a means to step out of the third dimension and choose to live in the higher third and fourth dimensions. Knowing the rules to the games we are playing is a really big deal. Most don’t even explore the rules, because they are too busy moving from past to future and they don’t spend a moment of conscious time in the present.

Relationship is the biggest game on the planet and most of us don’t know the rules. We therefore don’t know how to play successfully and with ease. You are in relationship to everything that surrounds you. How you perceive is very fundamental and affects your experience of your surroundings and of other people. Many of us understand relationship in a certain way because those outside of us have said: “Here are the rules; this is what you should do; this is how you should move through life. This is right/wrong; this is truth and this is not truth. We hang out with these people here, but we don’t talk to those people over there.” In other words, your relationships too have been conditioned from childhood. The third dimension is conditional. In the third dimension there is no such thing as “unconditional”. Unconditionality begins in present time, in the fourth dimension. Yes, we live in both the third and fourth dimension simultaneously and it is our conscious or unconscious choice to live in one or the other at any and every moment.

One of the most fundamental aspects or “rules” of the relationship game is to understand masculine and feminine energy. I’m not talking about bodies, men and women, husband and wife, parent and child nor about lovers, I refer to your nature and expression of personal masculine and feminine creative energy. Without understanding masculine and feminine energy we can become very much out of balance.

Have you ever noticed that the masculine and feminine don’t quite communicate on the same wavelength? The masculine and feminine somehow seem to misconnect in this third dimensional reality. There is a very good reason for this. Let me illustrate the difference between masculine and feminine as simply as possible. I am going to use the concept of geometry. Don’t get scared by the word geometry, I’ve explained it earlier. In a simple way, masculine energy is made up of straight lines and angles, feminine energy is made up of curves and swirls. There are no straight lines and angles in feminine energy and there are no curves and swirls in masculine energy. Feminine energy is also very energized and fast, masculine energy is slow and dull. Simply said, masculine energy holds about 40 points of energy and feminine energy holds about 140 points of energy. Feminine energy is very expansive, very creative and very fluid. Feminine energy can do 25 things at one time while it swirls and curves. Masculine energy says ‘straight line’, go down a straight line. Go from point A to point B to point C and back to point A. Both types of creative energy are absolutely valuable to have at your access for balanced creations.

However, masculine energy without feminine energy is not whole, it does not feel valued, it is not nurtured or appreciated. It feels incomplete. I am not talking about the men, and yet, yes, I am talking about the men. I am not talking about women, and I am talking about women as well. More importantly, I am talking about your personal masculine and feminine balance. Female energy without masculine energy is not whole, it feels unsupported, it is not focused, it is scattered and unstable, it is without purpose, and as a result it has no sense of success.

When masculine is strong and feminine weak.
In the third dimension, when masculine energy is out of balance it may show up in several ways. Now, make what I am about to say very personal. See if you can apply it to your own creative energy. Please hear the words and also read between the lines. When the masculine energy feels as if it is not good enough, when it is in fear, when it has been told it will never succeed, that it is not worth anything and that it has no value, it is off balance. To compensate, the masculine energy may demonstrate a false strength. It kind of puffs itself up and says: “I have these great ideas and these big dreams; I want to lead and create this. I know what I’m doing. Follow me!” That is all very real. And when a female who also is in fear and weak, is timid or withdrawn, finds this puffed up male it is a perfect match. In fact, the Law of Attraction gives each of them exactly what they are asking for. As it plays out, however, it will look like this:

If you would in your mind draw a straight line and then make an angled line moving off of that first line. The masculine energy leads: “Come with me! I know. I have this great dream. I am going to build this wonderful house for you in this beautiful place.” And the feminine energy says, “Oh, this is so wonderful. I also want a big house in this place.” The masculine and feminine start out together at the first point of the line and the masculine goes forth and the feminine, because feminine has curves and swirls, begins to create. She selects new paint, new drapes, and designs the landscaping. She is thrilled and satisfied that she will get to create her nest. The masculine continues forward and then his habits of fear and self-doubt pop up. The masculine hesitates and becomes afraid of failing. “I don’t know what to do. Because I am told that I am hopeless. I am not going to succeed. I am not worth anything.” and the masculine doubts his ability and stops moving forward on building the big house. So the masculine has built 80% of the new home. He has traveled 80% down that blue line then says: “No, I think we should move to a tropical climate and it will be much nicer and we can have a house on the beach . I know what is best. Follow me to it!” The feminine energy is out there swirling around in that 80% finished place and must now stop creating. She is now incomplete. She isn’t able to complete her plans. The feminine energy says: “Oh well, okay, a tropical beach would be nice. I would love a beach house in Hawaii. I love you and trust you.” And they move, but she is incomplete. He is also incomplete, but he begins to build the house in Hawaii. Again the feminine swirls and it curves and begins to have fun creating in Hawaii. She buys the flooring and plants the flowers. Again, 80% into the process, the off-balance “strong” masculine says: “Well, I think I need to change my job, which means we have to move to Africa. Come with me to Africa and we can have the beach house some other day.” Once again the female energy is incomplete. The masculine energy drives the game and the feminine energy begins to get frustrated and angry and maybe even resentful. The feminine creativity is being dampened because she was very excited about the beach house. She was getting very creative because that is what feminine energy does. And so it continues and continues.

We began discussing the difference between feminine and masculine creative energy and what occurs when those energies are out of balance. Keep in mind that we are not talking about male and female people. This is all about the creative energy that we each can tap into and utilize. No matter what gender or orientation, we all have access to some wonderful masculine and feminine creative potential. We also talked about what occurs when the masculine energy demonstrates as dominant and the feminine demonstrates as weak. Let’s continue with other possibilities of imbalance. Notice if you recognize these patterns in the lives of those around you. And in the way you create.

When feminine is strong and masculine weak.
If you reverse the roles that we discussed above and the feminine energy is very strong and the masculine energy is weaker it is as if the feminine energy says: “I have these grand dreams and desires. I wish to have this … I want that … I would like to have these others over here.” But sometimes beneath this apparent strength and determination there is “I cannot have”, “I don’t deserve”, “I can’t receive”. Feminine creative energy without the balance and structure of masculine energy is very scattered, it is very undependable. It is as if you pour water onto the surface of the table, it spreads everywhere, it is not contained, focused or directed. There is no structure (cup) in place to hold the feminine creative power.

When this off-balance feminine asks of the masculine “Oh, I want you to build me a house”, the masculine says: “I’d love to build you a house. I am a carpenter, I can build you a house. I love you.” And he goes off in his excitement and gets the wood, stone and electrical wiring and begins to build a beautiful house. This is the creativity of straight lines and angles we talked about earlier. In the meantime the feminine energy has continued creating. After asking for a house she went off to yoga class, tea with friends, shopping and bought the ingredients for a gourmet dinner. Curves and swirls of creativity. When she finally brings her attention back home, she asks the masculine: “Hello – What are you doing?” “I am building you a house.” he replies. She then says: “Really what I want is to move to the beach and have a house there.” “Okay, I can build you a house at the beach.” the masculine says. “Oh, that would be so wonderful.” the feminine energy replies. And off they go and the story repeats itself. With this ungrounded, scattered pattern, the masculine energy feels invalidated, unappreciated, unheard. This scattered feminine energy is swirling all around in an uncontained manner and the masculine energy follows her, or tries to. When she changes her mind again and again, the masculine also changes his direction for her, trying to build a house, a structure within which she can be happy and create. However, with this pattern, both the feminine and masculine creative energy are incomplete and over time, there is frustration. Do you know someone like this? You? This person is ungrounded, doesn’t complete the many projects they have begun while they busily come up with even more ideas. They may also have saved all the materials and supplies they collected for each of these projects – for years, promising to get to them someday.

When the feminine is weak and the masculine is weak.
There is also the pattern of weak feminine energy together with weak masculine creative energy. In this case, neither are creating easily and neither receive or fulfil their desires. Both are terrified. Weak energy does not create, it gets very frustrated and it has no permission to speak up, to set direction, to take charge. Sometimes in this case neither the masculine nor feminine can define or ask for their desires. The first step of creation is not even taken. The masculine energy doesn’t build the structure for the feminine to create within and the feminine doesn’t even define what she wants him to build. You may recognize this creation-pattern in those around you. Decisions never seem to get made and they change their minds frequently. There is no forward movement. Inertia can occur. Both are wanting the other to make the decision of what movie to go to and soon it is too late. All the good movies have already come and gone. As a personal exploration you might become aware of this dynamic demonstrated in the lives of others around you and ultimately in your own creative process. Do you know someone who exhibits inertia and is not creating fully in a way you know they have the potential too? Perhaps they don’t take risks and use vocabulary that is self-defeating?

When the feminine is strong and masculine is strong.
The flip-side of this is a creation pattern of strong feminine and strong masculine. Again, both are in fear and internally in a great deal of confusion and insecurity. There will be lots of competition, pushing and shoving, incompletion and turmoil. Both creative powers here can be very uncompromising and stubborn. Consequently, both dig in their heels and nothing gets created. You may know people who do this in their creative space. They may boast and brag and present themselves as confident and accomplished, but in actuality, have achieved very little in their lives. This person may “know it all” and argue with every suggestion others make.

How did we get so out of sink?

When the masculine creative energy inside of you is too weak or strong and the feminine inside of you is too weak or strong, we call this the third dimensional game of “I’m not okay”. That is where most of us have learned to be and live our lives. How did we get here, in this off balance state? Here is an example: There is a little girl or little boy who is very talented, very skilled and very knowledgeable. She is very excited about who she is and what she wants to do. She is very confident, into herself and what is possible. She simply says, “I can!!” This little child sets out on her path and creates wonderful drawings and great art. She sings all the time and passionately builds amazing things. At perhaps three years old she is extremely successful in her world and one day says to her favorite grown-up, “Look at my elephant” because it is a beautiful elephant and she is very pleased with her creation. The grown-up says, “Don’t you know elephants aren’t orange? And besides, this is a scribbly mess. You should color inside the lines.” This is such a shock and invalidation to her that this little child drops down and gives up her confidence and power. The “you’re not okay” belief slides right into that little slot where “I’m great and successful” used to be just a moment ago. At first the little child is confused, then she does one of two things. She may say, “Well, I’ll show you” and goes through the rest of her life working to prove she is good. She may become a Type A personality and over-achiever in order to show that long-ago grown-up that she really is of value. However there is still a little doubt “Am I okay?” that sits in her space and her beliefs about herself. She has private thoughts like, “I am not sure whether this painting that I just did is really worth ten thousand euro even though on the outside she presents herself as absolutely confident, determined and strong. The other possible reaction the little child may have is, “Well, maybe that grown-up was right. Maybe I’m not that good after all.” She may never return to that powerful, talented expression that she once had. That passionate child grows up to hide, doubt her every decision and not take many risks.

Every one of us has experienced the result of this distorted creative energy. Once you understand the distinctions and power of feminine and masculine creative energy you’ll be better able to balance them and create more powerfully from that fullness. Then, when you step into a relationship, you will continue to hold the belief that you count and have value. There will be no push or shove, competition or invalidation. There will be no better or worse. There is then a balance between and within your masculine and feminine ways of creating. Once balanced you will recognize yourself and move forward into joyfully painting those elephants any color you choose with playmates who celebrate with you.

We have defined masculine creative energy (straight lines and angles) and feminine creative energy (swirls and curves). We discussed what happens when those creative energies are out of balance with each other, when one is dominating and one is weak. Please keep in mind that we are talking about your personal creative energy here, not bodies and genders. We also talked a bit about how each one of us gets in this place of misalignment. Do take the time to read the previous articles too. There is much there.
When your masculine and feminine creative energies are aligned, balanced and playing well together, you are in the higher fourth dimensional state of being. As you’ve heard me say previously we all move between the third and fourth dimension throughout our daily life. We live in both simultaneously.

Higher vibrational words such as ease, laughter, community, co-creation, respect, admiration, appreciation, balance are experienced when we are in the fourth. Versus denser, slower experiences like competition, depression, guilt, blame, victim, which are only experienced when we are in the third. In the fourth there is no lack. There are no limitations. There are no ‘shoulds’ or ‘should nots’ and you cannot do anything “wrong” there.

When healthy masculine energy is in relationship with the healthy feminine, masculine creativity has the room and the opportunity to come up with new ideas and build new plans. He now has the motivation and drive to learn, grow and expand into new realms of possibility. Masculine feels validated and has the support to explore new structures he can build for the feminine to create within. Healthy masculine energy also loves balanced female energy and says: “How can I uplift, nurture, and provide for this feminine creativity? How can I assist her in creating her dreams? Together we can create new worlds.” This occurs within each of us individually as well as within an external relationship. The man builds the raised garden beds and the woman plants and tends the vegetables and herbs. I’m sure you’ve seen two (or more) people come together and do some pretty wonderful things as a team.

When healthy feminine creative energy is in alignment and balance with the healthy masculine, it has the structure and scaffolding necessary for creativity. It can easily and passionately design and plan, execute, and bring to fruition its dreams. It can fully focus on its studies and research, its writing and craft, the music and math that it loves so well. Balanced masculine energy provides structure, dependability and stability. It is reliable, there is a focus, strength and a sense of protection for the feminine energy to experience itself safely and with permission. When feminine energy is safe and has permission it is expansive and creative. The masculine creates a container or field that offers the feminine a dependable space to create and be happy. It is from this balance of give and take that a flow unfolds. It is then that the feminine can say, “I would like a house. Really what I want is to move to the beach and have a house there.” And the masculine energy smiles and says: “I can build this for you. How big and what color?” There is then a give and take, a cooperation and co-creation. The feminine says, “What you have built is wonderful. Can we build a garden also? Is it possible to add a couple of birdhouses too? What about…?” As the feminine creates further and wider, the masculine expands the structure to make plenty of room for her swirls and curves. There is balance. There is the shared thrill of creating in passion together.

In this higher fourth dimensional balance, this combined creative energy becomes very powerful and has the capacity to simply look at the third dimensional world and say: “I hear your opinion of me not being worthy. That is not where I choose to go. Thank you very much.” There is no discussion or negotiation. No energy is thrown and no one is invalidated. You make your choice, then you dust off your sandals and set about your business, allowing that other person the room to go about theirs.

Bringing the masculine and feminine into alignment I’ve described four ways that the feminine and masculine are out of sync with each other and suggested you begin observing others in your world that demonstrate these aspects. This curious observation is still a good idea.

Another way to identify, experience, and begin to anchor masculine and feminine energy into your creative process is in the vibration of words. Words are a simple, easy place to begin to re-wire your masculine and feminine creative energy into balance. These words are part of your natural alignment to the love that you are, the essence of who you have always been but have turned away from because the relationship to those “out there” was more important than the relationship to the you “in here”.

So let me give you a sense of the masculine and feminine nature in seven special words (and others). Be playful with this. There is no right or wrong way of having this experience.

Masculine words have straight lines and angles. When you become or wear that word as an energy in your space, you can get a sense of the straight lines and angles. Feminine words have curves and swirls. A word that has a masculine nature to it would be, for example, the word Capable. So would you take a breath and feel the feeling of being Capable. Nobody’s opinion counts here but yours. Would you take a breath and feel within your body the strength of being Capable. Your body might want to sit up straight, your head may want to go back. Your shoulders may want to move back. It is a sense of “Yes, I am Capable”. Just pretend. Make it up at first if you have to. Capable, in this case, has a structure to it. It can be felt as a masculine word. Just feel its stability.

Now, would you add to Capable the vibration and feeling of being Certain about yourself. Is there anything that you do well? Can you tie your shoes? Are you Certain? Can you do it every time? Absolutely. I am Capable and Certain. Let your body be and feel these words. Let these two words create the structure or container (masculine) within which feminine creativity can experience itself. Without the structure and container, feminine words and creative energy flow out in a scattered way, with no direction. When you pour water onto a table without the benefit of a cup, you have a big mess.

Now would you find the feeling of Ease. It is like an exhale. This word has a more feminine energy in it. Ease has no structure to it. Would you let your attention Focus (masculine) on Ease while you are being Certain and Capable. Each one of us has masculine and feminine creativity within us. Certain, capable, ease. Let yourself experience the feminine flow and would you not only feel ease but would you also like yourself.

I Like Me has no boundaries, no edges, no lines and no angles. I Like Me. And now would you give yourself Permission. Permission has no lines. It is “Wow, I can do this!” You are building a container of Certain, Focus, and Capable to allow Ease and Permission to have their freedom. Now would you find another feminine word. Would you find the vibration of Kindness, which is very powerful and very feminine.

Now one last word: Would you allow Appreciation to begin to flow within your space. Allow yourself to Appreciate the Capability and Certainty that you now have Permission to experience. Allow it to be very Focused.

Another suggestion: create lists of masculine and feminine words. Wear one of each every day. Experiment. Also, begin to play by choosing a “masculine” word and finding the feminine aspect of it. You might quickly recognize the straight lines and angles of Certainty but see if you can touch the “feminine” aspect of that word too. The feminine might hold Certainty when the row of lettuce she just planted is sure to germinate. The feminine word, Gentle, also has a masculine aspect. Like a gentle grandfather, holding the infant. Get the picture?

You might also become aware in your daily life of how you create. Begin to consciously, intentionally incorporate both feminine and masculine creativity. For example: If you have a big project at work, say designing a new marketing campaign, it is important to understand the budget you have to work within and what online ads cost. It is also important to understand the limitations and size/color specifications required for online advertising. If you instead simply rushed into designing ads (feminine), without the understanding and structure (masculine) of the system you might have a beautiful but useless piece of advertising. Create the structure or foundation first, and then happily create within it.

You are powerful. You are big. You are significant. You have never been small and you have always been the little child who was Capable and talented with Certainty and Ease. You just simply let a grown-up talk you out of it for a moment and now that moment is over. Right now you are Certain and Capable and Focused. You are in Appreciation, Permission and Ease again. “I like me”—just like you did as that little child.

As you balance this masculine and feminine creative energy and begin to choose which to use in each situation, the world around you will change significantly. It is all about you. You are the only one that counts and when you can begin to consciously choose how to create, you are going to find that the light that you hold becomes so magnetic that your service to others will be effortless.

This of course is only a first step, the journey within can only really begin when you’ve at least to some extent balanced these two, or at least have some control over them.

Just remember you have a left and right brain, male and female. So it’s not about a physical male or female, on the other hand there is a tendency to have the strongest one, associated to the body, the female principle with a female body or male with a male body. Society has played a role in this too. And in some cultures more strongly so.

Often due to taking the religious stories literal and not realizing it goes beyond the material, it’s often said that we are not in touch with our feelings anymore, intuition and gut feelings, that we are pressed to live by intellect. While this is true in some sense, intuition and gut feelings are from the same subconscious, having collected data of which you often were not aware of, while you live your life your conscious awareness only registers a fraction of the info you pick up, while at the same time it gathers loads of data through the senses that you are not aware of and it stores the data in your conditioned file system. Now you might have such feeling arise but can’t really say or define what it is because you can’t look at where and how it came into being. Your gut feeling can be linked to a situation in your past that was poorly judged, a fear that was misplaced but when it arises and you feel uncomfortable you act on it as if it came from some sort of higher insight, it is therefore important that one looks within, see how it came about and if valid become clear instead of “it doesn’t feel right” and perhaps so not overcome its limited points of view. The very reason why the feeling body must be balanced with the male principal. Because personality, your ways of looking at the world and your ways of responding to it, are driven by that same conditioning in the subconscious. I’ve explained some time back that you could have been somewhere where the situation was unpleasant, and unbeknown to you your senses registered thousands of things, for instance a smell of a perfume or some sort of chemical they used there to clean the place where you had the experience, and now your senses pick up a similar smell and triggers that feeling of being uncomfortable, which wants to make you say “I don’t know what it is but my gut feeling tells me to leave”. That is not to say it’s right or wrong, but it could be either way. So the journey within, the true knowing thyself is vital, and true self is of course not the conditioned little I point of view.

This balanced male/female principle therefore goes hand in hand with the inner path.


25-11 – 2018

Moshiya van den Broek